I hate blogging. You know why? Because I can't stick with it. It's like a model car you get halfway through and then say "aw heck with it" because it really just looks crappy. Seriously, this is about the 5th blog I've started, they're all probably floating out there in cyberspace somewhere cold and alone with no one to read them. So why is this one any different? Perhaps it's not. I guess I got bored with the others because I realized I just didn't have anything to say. So why would anyone read this? I mean look at it. It totally stinks. Check out all the sentence fragments and poor grammar. Not to mention the fact that I really haven't even said anything this entire paragraph worth reading, remembering, or for that matter commenting on.
My eyes hurt. I've been staring at this computer screen for 3 hours straight and I can't stop because my brain won't let me sleep. So here I am typing non-sense blogs into my laptop which, if it had any intelligence in it's 100 gig brain, it would vomit them out if its disc drive.
Maybe my problem is that I don't really have a goal or purpose for my blog. Is it like a cyber-journal where I write down my thoughts and feelings for you to peruse and judge thus fulfilling my need to be appraised and perhaps even approved? If so, I may only pad it with self-serving diatribes which sound all existential and deep while in reality amount to nothing more than cynical bull pizzle.
Or is it more of a topical format where I act as a gadfly prompting heated discussions with provocative and probing questions?
Should I use it to entertain with silly stories showcasing my humor thus endearing myself to you through laughter?
I guess I just want to be honest. The reality is that I'm still pretty immature, I'm still figuring out the world and myself. I try very hard to make it look like I know what I'm doing and I can probably do a good job fooling most people some of the time. But spend enough time around me and you'll see the truth.*
*I looked up exactly 4 words in the dictionary before using them in this post. Can you tell which ones?
